Oral today was better than the english oral....hmm...

Sometimes i really wonder...why you had work hard for something..perhaps to get some attention or to be in with that group or that certain person..and in the end...when it comes to result...the person get all the credit...all the praises..when the person could do is to sit there and talk crap...and did nothing...i know that feeling...that kind of sadness...is very terrible...or is like...you worked REAL hard for that certain friendship...its not only d*** but also you guys...i want to be a friend that when outing,you will also call..it really hurts inside...the feeling of being left out...at least..ask? im sitting right in front of you and you only ask the person beside me and left...leaving that place..i have to auto myself to leave...if not...would you even want to call me??no one got attitude problem..is you yourself having attitude problem...no one get angry so easily...is you yourself...small thing also attitude...is that what they say...when it comes to this kind of situation..that what christian family are for...i rmb joanna saying that...christian family give that kind of warmth...that kind of care and help...and won leave you to lurch..is that it?is it me?or is it them?i did my best to change...im not dumb...i know what going on..don assume it...i may look weak..but i did complete races like 10km,challenge, 35km...what makes you think i cannot come back in 1h for 10km?and what makes you think that i will come back in 1h for 5km?am i that weak?that useless?so what if i did badly for my 2.4? you just think that...oh!5km..cannot la...need rest...then while running,i will slow down in pace?mind you...im not that weak..i may look weak on the outside but not inside...that what you call friends?carn you all just ask in a proper manner??not sound like ordering??i had been bearing all these...i didnt talk back in a stern attitude tone...why am i bearing all these??i really wonder why...why am i doing all these knowing that...no matter how hard i try...friends..after all..will not become best friends...but...that kind after graduate, lost contact that kind...not to you but to me...why fighting so hard??

sian....tml d&t in the morning...mayb going pierce sec...to visit teck hong kor kor and to see soon-to-be cousin-in-law...hmmm...